Rose-Colored Glasses

Today is Saturday, July 20. The last time that this date fell on a Saturday was on my wedding day in 2019. My wedding day was five years ago. Five years.

Five years seems like such a long and significant block of time. I don’t know how the years have passed by so quickly.

If Brady hadn’t died of bone cancer four months after we got married, we would be celebrating our wedding anniversary together today. Since we would both be college graduates, we would probably have engineering jobs and have a home together in the suburbs. My life would be completely different than it is now. Nothing would be the same.

Sometimes I look back on 2019 with rose-colored glasses. My memory can trick me and make me believe that life was perfect five years ago when Brady and I were together. Obviously, my time with Brady was some of the best years of my life, but life wasn’t perfect. Even our wedding day had its challenging moments.

For example, a couple of weeks before our big day, the cancer in Brady’s body spread to his jaw. Because of this progression, Brady received radiation shortly before we got married. The radiation to his jaw gave him radiation burn on his tongue, causing terrible pain for Brady. On our wedding day and all throughout our honeymoon, Brady experienced a lot of pain in his mouth. It was hard for him to eat and talk. Even on one of the best days of his life, Brady was in significant pain.

Even with all of this pain, Brady celebrated our love on our special day and decided to make the best of what he had. Even today, his attitude and outlook on life inspire me to be grateful for the blessings of life, even if they exist alongside hardships. This week, I came across the letter he wrote for me to read on the morning of our wedding. Even though he was in pain, he wrote about the excitement and joy he had about our marriage.

–

Dear Mollie,
The morning has finally arrived! I’m sure that we are sharing many strong feelings right now, everything from joy, excitement, nervousness, love, and hope for our future together.
…
I know that we both aren’t perfect and our wedding day won’t be 100% perfect, but us together, that is perfect…I could not picture myself spending the rest of my life with anyone except you. You mean the absolute world to me, and I cannot wait to start this next chapter of my life as a new chapter in our lives. I know that it will be an incredible ride, and we will keep growing closer together as our love grows stronger.

This is going to be an awesome day, so although we are both nervous, let’s enjoy it and make it a great day that will live as a memory forever.
I love you!
~Brady

–

Brady was right. Our wedding day lives in my heart as a beautiful memory that reminds me of the timeless love Brady and I had for one another.

The days with Brady may not have been perfect, but they were so lovely. I will always treasure our time together as a gift from God. Even though I wish we could’ve spent more July 20s together, I know that the time we did share will continue to impact me for the rest of my life.

Photo: Anna Laero Photography