Wife to Widow

I married the love of my life on July 20th, 2019. I woke up that morning, giddy and excited to make the lifelong commitment to my love, Brady Hunker.

I really liked being a wife, but I loved being Brady’s wife. I selflessly put him first, no matter the cost. I loved him with every fiber of my being.

Then, he died. In the dreary month of November, 128 days after our wedding, he took his last breath right in front of me. We promised each other a lifetime, and only got 128 days.

It was the best four months of my life. We were able to have a home together, learn together, and love each other. But, we were supposed to grow old together and see our kids grow up. Cancer took all of that away from us.

And now, it’s been 128 days since Brady died. Tomorrow, I will wake up and have been a widow longer than I was a wife.

That is just awful. I hate that widowhood is my new reality. I wish I could go back to napping on Brady’s lap, or singing “Take Me Home Country Roads” with him as he played guitar. I would give anything to give him another round of his evening meds, or feed him jello once he lost all strength.

I loved being his wife, and I hate that his death made me a widow. How am I supposed to live another 128 days without him? How can our love story already be over? How can it be true that I will never see him again on this earth, and I’m only nineteen?

I’m a teenager, and somehow, I will have been a widow longer than being Brady’s wife. That will always be the case now.

Photo: Anna Laero Photography