Widow at 19

Since Brady’s death, several people have told me that if I pray enough, God will take away my grief. Basically, if I pray and fully trust in Jesus, my pain and heartbreak will disappear. I honestly don’t know why people think that prayer will fix everything. The Bible is full of faithful people who suffer. […]

On Sunday morning, I woke up and got ready to go to church. Right before I left, I put my wedding band on my left ring finger as I usually do. After church, I went bowling with some friends from Grove City. After bowling, my mother and sister came up to visit me! We all […]

I started back as a student at Grove City College last week, and I am currently living in the home that Brady and I had together. I guess some would say my life is starting to go back to normal. While I disagree, entirely, with this idea that my life will ever reach normalcy, I […]

Sometime after Brady was diagnosed with bone cancer, he told me he wanted to buy a gold cross necklace. I thought it was a good idea, so I helped him look for some different ones. We went to the mall once, and there was a kiosk that was selling some gold cross necklaces! I saw […]

I have recently moved back into the apartment that Brady and I shared together. Some think this is silly, I didn’t think twice about it. Moving back into our home has allowed me to recall so many memories about living here with Brady. On this Sunday morning, I find myself reminiscing even more than usual. […]

For my wedding day back in July, I decided to wear pink nail polish. I got pink gel polish for my fingernails, and I just used “normal” pink nail polish for my toes. I got both sets of nails done at a salon on July 19th, the day before my wedding. My gel polish lasted […]

Before my husband died, my knowledge of grief was extremely limited. Like most people, I thought that there were five linear stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance). And while I’m only six weeks into this “grieving thing,” I can say for certain that my grief does not come in linear stages. Each day […]

For the past month or so, I have spent most of my time by myself. I would not recommend this to anyone, especially those in the midst of immense loss. A few days ago, a friend of mine asked if we could have lunch together. At first, I dreaded the idea of putting in the […]

2019 has been the best year of my life. In January, I was accepted into Grove City College! In March, I went to Disney World with the love of my life! My favorite memory from that trip was that Brady and I rode Test Track with only a 23-minute wait in line. Later in March, […]

I’m not surprising anyone when I say the first Christmas after my husband’s death has been difficult. I just wanted to hide under my fuzzy blanket and sleep through Christmas. I was so tempted to stay home instead of going to my church’s Christmas Eve service, but I went anyway. And, I’m so glad I […]